Woe is Me

I'm going to pull a David, so bear with me.
Last week, I officially came back to work with Channing. I've been off for about 8 1/2 months, so it's been an adjustment. Before taking off to have our second son, Asher, and to finally become a SAHM, I worked with Channing for about 3 years (give or take a few months). I was able to be off for about 4 months during that time to be with Tristan after he was born. When Tristan was 4 months old, we lost our front desk worker, so that meant me coming back. It was supposed to be temporary, but I was here for almost three years...with a baby! It was extremely stressful, so when we found out we were having baby #2, I knew I couldn't continue to work the office and take care of both boys at the same time. At that point, we began a job search. After a couple of failed attempts, we hired Gina. She was with us for about 9 months, and now she's gone on to work at our church. We're super excited for her because we feel it's more here calling, and we know that God has someone for us. However, with her loss I'm back...with 2 kids. Last week, Channing's mom kept the boys so I wouldn't have to bring them up here (she's so great!). It was a HUGE help, especially since Asher wasn't feeling well. She also came yesterday and kept them. Today, I'm on my own.
I was supposed to be here at 7:30, but getting both boys here and ready was more trouble than I had previously anticipated. Tristan slept later than usual, and Asher did not forget that he likes to eat as soon as he wakes up. I was frantically rushing around the house gathering clothes, diapers, snacks, etc. I poked my head in Asher's room, and my little sunshine was awake. Let me tell you, he didn't stay sunny for long! As soon as he realized he wasn't getting his morning latte, he freaked out. That was the start of chaos.
I grabbed him, sat him in the living room, turned on his Georgia fan video (we start 'em young), and listened to him cry as I ironed Tristan's clothes. Then Tristan woke up, I got him dressed, teeth brushed, hair fixed, breakfast ready, and we ran out the door. We made it to work at 8:30 (just a little late). We ran in to work for 15 minutes, then I had to load both boys back up to take Tristan to school. I dropped him off, got back to work, and finally fed Asher. I then put him in his pack n play for his nap (very late), but he didn't want to sleep because he wanted to check out all his new surroundings (ok moms who think schedules are important...I know you're freaking out with me). He did finally fall asleep (after about 30 minutes). His schedule is WAY off, and we're only through half the day.
This afternoon, I'll have both boys. I'll check patients in, do computer work, and answer phones all while chasing Asher around the office and removing whatever strange things he's found on the floor to put in his mouth and while fixing Tristan's DVDs, taking him to the bathroom, and fixing him snacks. Sound like fun? Well at some point, Asher will have a couple of meltdowns because he'll realize he's not being held, Tristan will freak out because it's a church night, and I'll lose my sanity...even if just for a moment. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
This is so stressful for me. However, like David who would begin a psalm with complaining, I'll end with praises to God. I have it so much better than so many. I am blessed with a happy healthy family. I have a wonderful husband, beautiful boys, and wonderful friends. I have a God who has nothing but the best planned for me. His Word says, "Commit to the Lord whatever you do and you plans will succeed." Prov. 16:3. I am standing, jumping, clinging to that verse. I am committing our office, our job search, my job as a mother and wife...everything..to God. Thank you, God, that you are my eye in the sky. Thank you that you have a plan for me, even if I'm a little (ok, a lot) confused about it. I miss my life at home with my boys. I miss seeing and talking to my friends, but I can't wait to see what you have planned for me. I know it's better than I could have planned.